As I sit here, two days just a day away from making it to 34 weeks, I am becoming more and more overcome with emotion. With the end of this pregnancy comes the end of almost 8 long years of either trying to get or trying to stay pregnant. It has been a crazy long road, with more twists and turns that we would have ever imagined possible (and most people still can't believe). It is just amazing to think of the number of tests I have gone through, number of treatment cycles, number of shots, number of dollars spent, number of losses suffered. I know for most people, having their last child must be emotional... but I'm sure it doesn't bring with it such an overwhelming sense of satisfying exhaustion. The marathon, treadmill, and fierce battle is ending. It is one that I have spent almost my entire marriage, my entire adulthood, fighting.
It was a wild ride leading up to the birth of Asa and Addison. As most of you already know, it took thousands of dollars, multiple losses, 2 1/2 years of trying, 3 months in the hospital, and 2 months in the NICU to get there. We started trying for this one only 6 months after the boys were born... and here we are 5 years later with a healthy baby kicking me in the bladder as I sit here. Five years, again thousands of dollars, more losses, too many shots to count, cycles and cycles of trying, a failure of an adoption experience and the resulting legal fiasco that followed and continues to follow. Wow. After all of this chaos, I'm so glad we decided to give it one more go... which we did after we had already decided to write off the possibility of baby #3.
It's just so hard to believe that in only a few weeks time, that baby that we had hoped and prayed for will actually be in our arms. Asa and Addison will actually be big brothers. They have no idea how difficult it was or how much of a miracle it is that they will get to have this little brother or sister... just like they have no idea how equally miraculous it is that they have each other.
But, we sure do.
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